Scribbler's Cafe

Unintentional Partial Nudity -or- Cover yourself up, Woman!

The emerald green shirt I am wearing out tonight is held together across my chest by only four tiny pearlescent buttons. The threads that hold them to fabric are already stretched to their maximum load bearing weight. It’s Friday night. Everyone wants to go where I am going, apparently. I push my way onto the train, certain that I will be the last person to fit – yet a good five or six people push on behind me. Even with the air conditioner on high, it is hot and humid on the train. My bare arms are mashed up against those of the other glamour girls heading out tonight and it takes only a moment for a sticky wet film to gloss our touching skin.

My body is tightly compacted by the crowd, my arms pressed against my sides. We ride like sardines for 5.32 long minutes. Bump, jostle, bump, jostle. A grievous side effect develops in response to my shrunken frame. Those stretch loops relax in the bump and sway, expand and lift over my shiny pearlescent buttons. I don’t notice, of curse, because there is no great movement to draw my attention and I’m pressed so hard into the back of the person before me that his solid form holds me together nicely.

Then the ride comes to an end. The doors whoosh open the people pour out. That sticky hot air is blown away by a gorgeous gust of wind and space. Yet, it quickly dawns on me that my relief was too swift and too generous. My shirt has flown open in the wind, not a single button hanging on to preserve my modesty.

Oh, crap.

Luckily, I wore my lovely new blue satin bra, admittedly inappropriate for public wear, but if I have to be caught in my underwear, this is my best option. Luckily, my writing habit has trained my fingers to be nimble and quick. Luckily, the large group of my homebound students was one car back. I had just enough time to manipulate my buttons and get decent before they caught up with me.

When they saw me, they nodded their heads and mumbled solemn greetings of “sensei.” I nodded back with all the reserved grace I could manage, obasans gawking all around me.

posted by Scribbler @ Monday, July 03, 2006